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“Don’t worry, I get what your saying. Now you know.”
“But I have to leave. I’m letting go now. I can’t stay here.”
“What?! But-”
“You see, I am not from here. The reason why I’m here is because I could not let go of the person that was buried here. And because I’m letting go, I have to go.”
I hugged Sean again. I couldn’t believe it. I have met the perfect guy and the perfect friend but I could not have him. It is true what Sean said before. The way the world works is so cruel. Eventually, everything the world gives will be taken back.
“Don’t worry. Eventually, we’ll see each other again,” he said with a smile. It was the first time I ever saw him smile. My heart skipped a beat when I saw him smile, just like it did when I saw him the first time. His smile was so sweet and innocent as if nothing in this world could ever go wrong. I felt tears run down my cheeks: the first time I ever cried since I knew him. I wanted to take his phone number or his address. I wanted to be in touch. I wanted to know how many miles away he would be. But when I saw him smile, I knew that someday we would meet again. There was no need for worry.
“Hal, you are the person who hae taught me to let go, but because of you I want to hold on. I wish I would have known you a long time ago. Then I would have been happy long before. I will miss you Hal.”
He gave me kiss on the cheek and made his way through the streets. I had only known him for a week, but I know I’ll be longing for him for a lifetime. And I just let him go.
***
Many months have passed since I met Sean. I never heard from him since then. I was never quite the same. I had been better. I don’t know why. Did I like him or love him? What was it about him that was so different? Maybe it’s because I want to be perfect for him like he was for me. Maybe I’m being better because I still don’t know if he sees me as a friend or more than that. There are so many questions. But now I know why people long for something badly even if there is no assurance that they will actually enjoy it. They have to take their chances.
All Saint’s Day came. My Aunt Bessie’s mausoleum was already fixed. Some of my relatives and I came to the cemetery to watch over Aunt Bessie. It was another sunny day. As everybody else was preoccupied, I hurried to where I first saw Sean. I was hoping I might see him there again. There was a bunch of people chatting near the tombstone where Sean had been mourning. I approached the group of people, determined to ask them about him. But as I neared them, I couldn’t help but be intrigued on whom Sean was mourning for.
I collapsed to my knees and started crying. I couldn’t breathe. I read the tombstone and there it said: In loving memory of SEAN BAUTISTA; born: August 9, 1988; died: March 23, 2005.
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Audrey Tangonan
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Comments
Sarah | Mar 15th, 2006
I really enjoyed your story. Thank you for sharing this.
good job! gidge | Jan 17th, 2008
wow! i love it! i wish i could write a story like that. to be honest i qm in the process of letting go myself so your words help me a lot. thank you.
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