To belong is to conform, to live by other people’s set of principles and values, to live reactively instead of proactively. For most people it is not what they are that holds them back; it is what they think they are not. People assume that they are inadequate, inferior and dull and that they are not beautiful. As a result of these assumed flaws they believe that no one can genuinely love them.
It is true that financial success, academic achievement and social or political status open no doors to peace of mind and inner security. Our souls are not hungry for fame, comfort, wealth or power because those rewards create almost as many problems as they solve. Our souls are hungry for meaning, for the sense that our lives matter, so that the world will at least be a little bit different because of our having passed through it.
The crave for love, attention and significance drives young people to the edge of themselves forces them to take up values and habits that are dictated by peers just to belong. In a short while a new reputation is gained because they sacrificed character on the altar of conformity. Ellen G. White wrote, “As a stream always partakes of the property of the soil through which it runs, so the principles and habits of youths invariably become tinctured with the character of the company in which they mingle.”
If only young people would realize that individuality is the aim of political liberty and that the world is put back by everyone who chooses to sacrifice his or her talents, values, principles and character on the altar of conventionality. That the real tragedy of life is the tragedy of the man who never braces himself up to face his fears, who never stretches to his full capacity and who never stands up to be himself.
If young people will only come to understand that we are free to choose the course of life we want to pursue and that our bodies, our brains and our features readily adapt themselves to that very course. George Benard Shaw once said, “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world but the unreasonable man attempts to adapt the world to himself therefore all progress among mankind is propelled by the unreasonable man.” It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. If you believe you have anything really valuable to contribute to the world it will come from your own personality, a spark of your individuality would make the difference.
Very few of us have developed any distinctive personal life. Everything about us seems secondhand. Samuel Johnson said, “Almost everyman wastes part of his life in attempt to display qualities he does not posses.” Never loose your individuality; it is the very thing that makes you unique. Your individuality confers on your relevance as long as you can keep it. Do not compromise yourself; do not allow your life to be a continual struggle to be what you are not and to do things you should never do. The first step to becoming better than you are now is by becoming yourself.
Your responsibility is not to remake yourself but to make the absolute best of what you are made of. Choose to live of your imagination instead of your memory, constantly frustrate tradition and conventionality with your creativity and imagination. Tie yourself to your limitless potential instead of your limiting past. Become your own first creation by using your imagination to produce the unimaginable you. Remember conformity is the enemy of growth and satisfaction.
Your ability to create and recreate yourself in your mind beyond your present realities would give you an edge in a world where people love to impose their ideas, ideals and values on others. Creativity is built into each and every one of us; it is part of our design. Each of us lives less of the life intended for us when we choose not to use the creative powers we possess.
Your visions and dreams must be based on a genuine understanding of who you are. It is only when you give yourself the freedom to be true to those important values that you have, then you are fulfilling your true purpose. Families, friends and foes may want to recreate you in their own image. They have preconceived ideas of who you should be, what you should do and how you should live. It is left to you to either allow yourself to be recreated in the image of someone else or choose to authenticate your God-given self.
The world is waiting for you. It waited for Martin Luther and he arrived. It waited for Shakespeare and he showed us the gift of literature. It waited for Mother Teresa and she redefined the frontiers of love. You have something the world needs, do not be carried away by what others say and do. Do not ignore who you truly are and pass this world unnoticed. Remember one of the hardest things about climbing the ladder of success is getting through the crowd of clones at the bottom.
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