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Any form of conversation by whomsoever communicated, as far as it is speaking of bad of others, there is no reason that it can not be backbiting, whether it is practiced by Pope, Sheikh or Prime Minister or President or Journalist or Doctor or whoever else. Sometimes when we get accustomed to an environment, which may be bad or good, it is very hard to detach ourselves from that situation, since we are somehow adapted to it, we feel comfortable. In such a case we may tend to assume that even though it is wrong we assume it as right and we just continue with the practice and it happens to be “informally legitimate”. And the same is true for Backbiting, it seems that it is becoming normal and accepted among the norm, which is indeed so bad. There are a number of unwritten laws formulated by society that serve as means of regulating activities and movements of people so understandably and help the members of a society to communicate smoothly without referring to any codes.
One of the reasons, why we are backbiting, it is because we are irresponsible and neglectful of the effects and outcome it is creating in the healthy community life. The existence of Backbiting in any society implies the decline in moral values of that given society, which implies “death”. The moment that any given society starts this evil whispering, the angel of death is getting a good place, which will ultimately lead to negativity. At this point that given society has to perish or reborn in values. Man as a social animal needs strong and health bond to live with one another, and this bondage should have strong foundation, which could not be shaken by any impediments that may cause to destruction. Community life is mainly based on mutual trust and understanding. Never in the history of mankind that the unity of people is founded upon backbiting, it is impossible to have composition like that, it is like allowing water and fire to dwell in the same container. Backbiting is a disease that resides in every individual heart, which affects community life, and creates distrust among the individuals and ultimately leads to chaos.
It is good and preferable to listen to the words of Great individuals who walked on the earth like Benjamin Franklin who said, the heart of the fool person is in his mouth, and the tongue of the wise person is in his heart. Some times it is not even safe to talk about good of people which may lead to or end up by talking something negative about them, and it is better to remove oneself from discussions like this for we do not benefit from this kind of conversations, and rather talk about events and ideas that brighten and widen our understanding. Albert Einstein said: Great people discuss ideas, moderate people discuss events and small people discuss about people; which I believe is the best principle that humanity can practice and measure the value of any person. It is better to live good life than a bad one. It is not our education, wealth, social status that makes us a great person, but rather it is our characters and deeds that certify our true reality.
It is strange to say that Backbiting has some good aspects, for people practice good deeds from the fear of being backbitten. Reputation is a hidden and manifested desire in any human being which may vary depending on the degree of the want of individual. Backbiting can be true or false in character, but the main nature of it, is we speak of a matter that the doer does not want to be told or wanted to keep secret or we may fabricate a story that may harm the personality of the individual, and speak to others in his absence. In order to keep their reputation in any given society, people are forced to behave by the standards of the norm and it assists to keep the balance of any given society to be at “normal temperature”.
Backbiting is divisive, it is the leading cause among the friends of a disposition to withdraw. If any individual should speak ill of one who is absent, it is incumbent on his hearers, in a spiritual and friendly manner, to stop him, and say in effect: would this detraction serve any useful purpose? ‘Abdu’l-Bahá
Written by Dereje Amera
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Dereje Amera
Writing is a powerful instrument to promote one's ideology, so as to transform and galvanize the whole of humanity to have a better perspective about this world.
Words are just combinations of letters, but the power they exert in every human frame is still a mystery to all.
Writing uses these mysterious forces of words as a tool to introduce, induce and create vibrations in society, which do have an influence on every aspect of our life as human beings.
May the power of WORDS prevail over all!!
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Comments
Brian Kitchens | Feb 1st, 2005
Backbiting, like most bad practices, is motivted by fear. Someone is afraid to fail, so they make themself feel better by hurting someone else. One person has a nice spouse and another person gets jealous because they are afraid they can't find someone better, so they spread rumors.
Fear, fear, fear.
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