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Often, people don’t understand. “The rest of my family has not understood. My mother is angry at me, still blaming me for sleeping around. I did not, yet she does not believe me. One of my sisters thinks that my fiancé gave it to me and does not think I contracted it at work. We have had several arguments about this to the point of her demanding to see my medical paperwork. It has left a huge strain. My youngest sister constantly brings up how selfish I am to continue my pregnancy since I am going to die. The ironic thing about this my sister’s husband has Chrohns disease and is gravely ill, yet she is pregnant with baby number two at the moment. My two brothers have been pretty distant about it. My brother John is a preacher like my father. This September he was married but I was asked not to attend. What does that say? My littlest brother, I think, is just really crushed. I have tried to talk with him about it, yet he will not open up to me. One of the worst things about my conversation with family is that EVERYONE in my family, including my grandmother, knows I am positive without my consent. I have to constantly reassure her that I am not dying this year. All of my uncles and aunts know etc. It truly makes me uncomfortable to be around family gatherings.” Having experienced similar reactions, some of us know personally what it is to be HIV positive in a world that is ill-informed and clinging to ancient, often incorrect, spiritual teachings or other thoughts endeared into us by our families and society.
Is it time for change, time for a global awareness, and a time for a new conversation? Yes, some might say, yet to others, those who still live in fear and denial, the answer is no. I believe it is time for change, it’s time for the world to have “The Conversation” about HIV, and it is time we all step forward to help others have “The Conversation”. Hopefully this story has touched you in some way, has encouraged you to join in on “The Conversation”, and inspired you in some way so that you can freely have your own conversations.
This excerpt was taken from the new project, “The Conversation”, a book and film project about HIV disclosure. If you’d like to learn more, volunteer to share your own story, created your own video for the project, or want to know who is involved and who benefits from this project, then please visit our website: www.theHIVconversation.com This excerpt was shared here with permissions from Maria, who is just one of the many people who have already joined “The Conversation”.
Hopefully one day all of us can say such as this, such as Maria shares, “He does not touch me like I am diseased but like he always has. He has been nothing but supportive with my HIV.”
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