A perfect outing for the both of them so far...except for the horrendous traffic jam they had to go through early that afternoon.
They had traveled far indeed, away from the intrusions of familiarity and acquaintances. But the destination was well worth the journey. Not that it generally mattered, he would take her anywhere with him. He would go wherever she might go.
They arrived in time for dinner.
At the restaurant, they ordered a banquet to fill their empty stomachs. They talked about themselves and a myriad of issues as they wait. The atmosphere was warm, as if their long absence was of no subject.
"I'm happy to see you. Thanks for coming with me tonight," he said.
"You're welcome, and thanks for bringing me here," she said, with a smile on her face.
Their orders finally arrived. As they dined, he remembered the first time they went out for dinner.
Of all the things that happened during their foremost rendezvous, it was the minor instances that stuck in his memory. It was so clear to him the time she opted to fill his plate with pasta, and the time she volunteered to carry his helmet. She talked with so much sense, intellect and elegance that he'd sometimes get lost as he listened to her words...not that he was slow, only smitten. And then he realized how cute she was watching the panoply of fireworks. It was a short four-hour get-together, which completely changed his disposition.
As full as they were, they decided to promenade along the shoreline after a scrumptious meal. They walked towards the beach from the club as they shared stories and laughed at seemingly mundane interests. Deep inside he knew he had to tell her what he truly felt.
They took off their shoes and walked along the fine sand. The waves calmly crept upon the shore. The water reached up to their feet as they sauntered.
"This is a very nice place," she remarked. "Do you always go here?"
"No, first time. Although I've seen the place before it was built," he answered.
After a few minutes of walking, they sat down facing the stoic ocean.
As they stared blankly on to the vastness of night, a multitude of stars shone brightly high above, the wind brought a cool breeze. One could witness from afar the vibrancy of the place as people went about their leisurely wining and dining. But the beach was all theirs, aside from a group of friends on a night dip.
Suddenly, everything became silent. Before things turned awkward, he faced towards her and started talking.
"Look, can you hear me out for just a few minutes?" he asked.
"Definitely...is there something wrong?"
"No, no, every thing's fine," he replied. "I just want to say a few words."
He stuttered, a sign of hesitation. But he composed himself and immediately uttered his true intentions for that night, averting a total disposal of his agenda.
"I don't know how I arrived at this point. I thought I had everything and I was doing great. I have a wonderful family, an extraordinary set of friends, a very fulfilling job...I was living life. I went to places, traveled and met people...I even dated around thinking that it's how a 23-year old should live. Now I am not so sure why I can't be contented with that anymore...after I met you."
He paused for a while to gather his thoughts.
"I might have come off a little back-handed in the past but it was only because I was trying to protect myself...self-conservation they say. And despite the fact that I was stating my intentions of courtship, I didn't want to show what was not me. Now I'm risking it all...even if it assumes getting hurt one way or another."
"I am at this point where I am certain about what I feel. But it’s not easy for me that I am not so sure why you're here with me, and where you stand right now. Yes, it could be a given fact that you are giving me a chance, otherwise you won't go, right? But I cannot rely on intuition...I know I have to work hard for this and that's what I am doing. I have no clue as to what it takes to make you realize that my intentions are pure and true, but I feel that I have to try. I can't manifest my emotions any more than asking you for lunch or night out from time to time, saying how much I want to be with you and be there for you... and texting you good night or how-are-yous, providing proof that at the end of a busy day, it’s still you I think and care about. You may turn me down or not reply to my texts, but that can't make me give up... I will try just as much. I want to do more...and I can do more. I want to reach out and pull you to me. I want to be there for you...if only you would let me."
"I may have come too slow or too fast but I know that I have to tell you this sooner or later...because it's killing me. But then again, I can wait...time is on our side. I am willing to take forever walking after you, if in the end it would mean spending forever with you.”
He took a deep breath, held her hand, looked into her eyes and said, "I’m hoping that someday we’ll see eye to eye, and if at the end of the day things do not go the way we want them to…I’ll still be by your side.”
The clouds began to cover the moon partially. An almost surreal scene greeted the two with the celestial bodies perfectly positioned in the sky.
"I want to be sure this time. I want this to be it, and I pray that it be you."
To his surprise she hugged him, and everything he ever wanted was right there… around his arms.
This is also available in my blog at www.greatergoodradio.com
Go to Jay-R's Journal
« return.